A lot has happened thus far in the story...
A lot has happened in the past several years. Ya know.
What is the need for me to personally verbalize this now?
I am sad. I choose to write about it now.
The feelings are the same despite many life events, not necessarily life changes.
Everything changes, nothing changes.
No, I'm not settled down, even after 10 years.
I'm still searching for myself...
Despite going from place to place.
I feel like I go help people to distract myself from helping myself.
I am depressed
I have wanted to change but there is no change
Maybe verbalizing it here means something now. My desire to change?
Wait. Looking back, I have made some changes, in attitude mostly- I have tried, but why does it feel like it doesn't count?
I googled "what to do when your sad"
Google did not correct my grammar.
The first thing that shows up is the hotline, and the second link is an article on Oprahdaily.
It gives me long paragraphs to deal with- like the sadness wasn't enough.
It offers this to stop being sad:
-I can write (how meta), release my emotions and cry, create some small successes like washing my face, or "find what does make you happy (and laugh)", or reach out to someone (I'm laughing now).
The comments are a depressing read. Are they even trying the article's suggestions?
The third link is from the CDC, a more clinical and less verbose take on the whole sadness thing.
Thank god, no comments.
I treat myself by writing this fragmented poem.
